All of Grace

There's a lot about life that is unexplainable. I guess I am thinking about grace here. God takes the  foolish things of this world to confound the wise. He takes weak things to overthrow mighty things. He takes me and shows me all kinds of things which I had not known. I haven't earned the life I've led. When I look back, all I see is a little boy who came from a little village way up north. The little village was nothing and I was nothing in the little village. I was never stronger, or smarter, or more gifted or more successful than the next person.

The only way I've ever succeeded at anything was when God placed me in conjunction with a person of greater talent. The mining partners I had were always better men than I. I married an amazing woman. I ever only succeeded in leadership because the Lord put people of talent by my side. It's amazing and I don't bemoan that. I happen to know that I am more handicapped than most people realize. Without God, I am nothing. I am something (whatever that is) only because God's grace has willed it and He always lets me know that it is of grace and not of myself.

Last year, EVI nearly crashed. (It could still crash.) But last year, we approached the brink. My fault; my carelessness, I admit it. The Lord in His graciousness turned it around miraculously. I am overwhelmed with gratitude. Why did He do it? I deserved to crash and burn. It leads me to ask how the great majority of people in the world navigate through life without God? I can't fathom it. That they live and move and have being is only of grace. They don't know who to thank for that which they enjoy. So, they congratulate themselves, and thereby set themselves up for disaster. 

In one corner of my mind, I don't like being so insignificant, so small, weak and ignorant. On the other hand, I am overwhelmed with the magnanimity of God. 

Last night, Pastor C.A. Murray of 3ABN, asked the congregation of forty people how many were sure they were converted. Only five of us stood up. It puzzles me. I am wondering what people look at when asked that question. If I looked at anything in me I wouldn't be sure of my standing with God either. But, I am in no wise dependent on anything that I am, or I do, or I think for my salvation. I am the dependent on Him who said, "The work I have begun in you I will perform."  He will. I don't know what He'll have to do, but I know He'll do it. He's taken the nothing that is me and has worked miracle after miracle after miracle since I was born. Why would I fear that He will fail me now? 

This week, I went to Senegal. Can you believe that? Why would God do that? How many people does that happen to? 

Anyway, I enjoyed the trip. Senegal is a Muslim country. It is sandy, with few trees. The people are tall and slim, and they speak French (among other native languages.) OCI has had a project in Saint Louis, Senegal, for several years. Apparently, I was voted on the board last year. Steven Grabiner says he told me about it last year, but I don't remember. Anyway, he asked me to go with him and offered to pay my way. I had hoped not to travel abroad this year and already I have agreed to go to two places to help OCI out. (The next place will be in South Korea in April. Isn't that too bad?) 

The trip to Senegal was pleasant. I really enjoyed my time with Pastor Grabiner, Ronald Yaudas,  the Director of Riverside Farm in Zambia, and Pastor Luc Sabot, the Senegal Mission President. Luc was the Pastor in Sudbury when my mother died. He was gracious enough to drive us around and to take us home to his wife and children. 

The board meeting was, what should I say, interesting. Without telling any details I can say that I saw the most disgraceful shouting match that I've seen among Christians ever. These things happen. It didn't unnerve anyone except the participants. The most unfortunate thing is that this kind of lack of self-control and self-justification dishonors God. I felt diminished. They are our brother and sisters; they are us and we are them. A failure on anyone of our part affects the body as a whole. We are either diminished or edified by what any in the body do.  I have been compelled to beg God's forgiveness for the failure among us and to repent on their behalf. Does that make sense to you? 

In the end, we made the decisions we needed to make. We are home, and I am grateful for the trip. Why does God use me in such missions? It's all of grace. I have no clue otherwise. He'll use you too. Just surrender yourself to God and wait.